Living at my mommy's house...

Yep i am staying at my mom's till this weekend when i get to move in to my new place, Yes i do move alot so what hehehehe...

I was talking to my cousin last night & she said your moving again "wow you are your mother's daughter" lol its a family thing since my mom moves around like crazy. But she didnt stay in the same town she moved to different states thats a little bit different. And i hope she stays in Yakima, i love to have her so close for many reasons...

Well its funny living back at your mom's with your mom and your step dad and your moody 6 year old sister. Jaselle is getting used to it and i think once this weekend comes she is not going to be happy to leave hahaha...

I have figured out if i slide the two sofa's together me & jaselle can sleep together yet apart and i can get some much needed rest...

I also like that my mom makes me dinner like last night she made my favorite chili and cornbread yummy yummy.. Not the stuff bought in a can or the cornbread that is frozen...

Looking forward to tonights dinner... Oh ya and i like to spend extra quality time with my mom.

No more...

Ok i am done with his bullshit... I have had nothing but heartbreak over and over and i am sick and tired of his shit! Seriously, i am opening a child support case today and i am praying that i get more than $200.00 a month and he stays at his job once they start garnishing his wages. I need help financialy and he only wants to help when he thinks its convient for him...

Wish me luck on my child support case....

Moving...

Yep! I am moving yet again. I just need to downsize on some bills and get in to a cheaper place before winter time comes around... I put my 20 day notice to move so, i have been on the hunt looking for a place to rent. I havent had much luck so i am still looking and i am getting boxes ready and placing them in to Jaselle's room and will be moving my stuff in to a storage unit August 30th if for some reason i have not found and rented a place. I will stay with my mom if it comes down to that.
Its hard to think about moving again and especially without alex for the last 4 years he was there to help move the house basically all by himself. But i do believe that i am doing what is in the best interest for me and my daughter...

my angel baby

I had a miscarriage at 6 weeks pregnant. I woke up saturday july 18th, 2009 and noticed blood so, i went to the hospital after filling my bladder with water enough to try to see the baby since i was not far along. 2 ultrasounds one performed by a ultrasound tech and the other the er doctor they both said they could not see a viable pregnancy and that i had most likely had a miscarriage. My mom was there to watch Jaselle for me during this while i was at the hospital and this i can say is the WORST pain a mother can feel. For someone to tell you that you lost a precious baby and there is nothing you can do about it. I was just turning 6 weeks so there was no need for a d & c. As a mother you should never go through the pain you experience when losing a child no matter what situation. Till i meet my precious angel in heaven....

In memory of our angel baby

A sweet poem for all angel babys...

I thought of you and closed my eyes And prayed to God today I asked, "What makes a Mother?" And I know I heard him say A Mother has a baby This we know is true But, God, can you be a mother When your baby's not with you? Yes, you can he replied With confidence in his voice I give many women babies When they leave it is not their choice Some I send for a lifetime And others for the day And some I send to feel your womb But there's no need to stay. I just don't understand this God I want my baby here He took a breath and cleared his throat And then I saw a tear I wish I could show you What your child is doing Here If you could see your child smile With other children and say "We go to earth to learn our lessons of love and life and fear, but My mommy loved me so much I got to come straight here!" I feel so lucky to have a Mom who had so much love for me I learned my lessons very quickly My Mommy set me free. I miss my Mommy oh so much But I visit her each day When she goes to sleep On her pillow is where I lay I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek And whisper in her ear "Mommy, Please don't be sad today I'm your baby and I am here" So you see my dear sweet one Your children are okay Your babies are here in My home And this is where they'll stay They'll wait for you with Me Until your lessons there are through And on the day that you come home they'll be at the gates waiting for you So now you see What makes a Mother It's the feeling in your heart It's the love you had so much of Right from the very start

Pregnant!

Yes it's true! I am pregnant! I took 2 pregnancy tests on July 9th, 2009 after i started spotting and i waited a few days for my period to come and it didnt so i thought it was time to take a test to see if i was or not or if i was just stressed out. Well both tests were positive with a second faint line. I went to the clinic yesterday and took an offical test and yes i am pregnant approx 5 1/2 weeks. This is not the ideal situation for me at this time but, I do believe that god only gives you what you can handle and "everything happens for a reason".... The first person i told was a close friend of mine cynthia. Then i told Alex's mom the next day on friday that i took 2 tests and they both came back positive and she gave me a couple of hugs and told me that she would be here for me and i am glad because me and alex are no longer a couple. So i need the more support i can get! I told her i didnt want to tell alex for a litte bit due to his reaction from when i told him i was pregnant with Jaselle. So i am still not 100 % at how he knows but he eventually found out on friday night and he was so mad and yelled at me and i hung up on him and told him when he gets more respect for me to call back. Well the whole weekend i didnt hear from him. So monday comes and his mom tells me that Yes he is mad but, he should of been more careful if he was so worried about it and she told me not to stress on it, which i am not. Well then he called me last night twice one conversation was not so happy and then the second one was more happy and he is starting to actually get it through his head as he is going to be a daddy one more time... He shared a name with me that he really likes for a girl "Lexi" and i do like that too. So i guess all i can do is keep my head up and take one step at a time. And i will get through this and be blessed with another little baby. Oh i forgot my due date is 03/14/10....

ooo laaalaaa

You Are Shrewd and Talented

When You Are Comfortable: You are ambitious, and hard-working. Adversity allows you to shine. You resourceful and able to make due. People see you as honest to the point of bluntness. But they always know that you'll be fair. You have the good intentions. When You Are At Your Best: You are a hard worker. You need security and stability in your life, even if that means putting in long hours. People see you as solid and dependable. You are always able to see the good in situations. Other find this comforting. When You Are in a Social Setting: You are bold and dramatic. You have confidence in yourself, and that's enough to get you through anything. People see you as capable and goal oriented. You have your eye on the prize, and others admire that about you.

What Do Your Initials Say About You?

Yummy...

You Are Chocolate

You are dramatic, charming, and downright addicting. You have a strong personality, and and people are drawn to your fabulousness. You are stimulating and exciting. It's hard to get tired of you. You are incredibly likable and popular. You live a glorious life.

Are You Chocolate or Vanilla?